Expect the unexpected

Hi all - Here I am again, apologizing for the delay in writing my blog.....I know most will say "no need to apologize"....and thank you...

However.....

I have realized lately that I need to make time for what is important in my life....

And here is the reason..Always expect the unexpected.

Expect the day you won't have the chance to say I love you; I am sorry; or so long.....

Expect the day when you might not be able to give that hug or kiss to someone special in your life....

Expect the day when someone special will never be available again for an outing or a call....

For as much as we never want to think about these things....we should!

Two weeks ago I was present when we took my older sister, Chris, off life support. We never expected that she would fall 3 nights before and that the fall would have such a significant and tragic impact. We never expected that she would never wake up again.

I as walked into the hospital ICU with my niece, and my younger sister present I looked at Chris and said "well...you got us all here at once"...and tears streamed down my face. Yes; one thing she had asked for many times was for a "girls" trip to see her in NYC. Now...you know me...full disclosure and transperancy .... there were times in "planning" at trip that Chris would have one reason or another for it not to happen; just as at times the "timing" was off for others. I think now....what could have been "that important, at "that" time" that we could not have the trip occur??

That thought brought me back to the death of my brother. He always wanted my mom to visit his home in Texas and for one reason or another that trip never happened...not until she went to his funeral.....

I have spent the last two weeks and a few days reflecting not just on my missed opportunities with my sister, my mom and my brother and father...but of also the number of times "the timing is off" to spend with friends as well.

I know life is busy! Heck; a FT and PT job, housework, a significant other can fill more hours than in a day. And then I think of my friends and family that have children and that are caregivers to family members and I think...hhmmm...no wonder planning a connection is so hard.

But...here is my promise, if to none else but me....I AM GOING TO MAKE TIME....it does not have to be the perfect outing, it can be a few minutes to be face-to-face; to share to "in conversation and a hug....it does not have to include all the posse/pack/kids (whatever) ... it can "just be".

I have also thought about broken fences....we all have them....they are especially challenging and sad when with family. Again...my transparency....Chris's and my relationship was not always perfect and at times not even pleasant...however I know for me and I believe for her we just didn't always know how to approach what was happening. I have thought much about "everyone having a story we don't know" and I am coming to realize that we will never know it until we ask. So..ASK! TALK! If you are in a tense or strained relationship with family or friends be brave enough to approach it; with love, understanding, respect and tact. Listen and speak from the heart.

I am thankful that I did see Chris at my niece and nephew's about 6 weeks prior to her passing and we had a very nice time conversing and spending time as family. This is the memory I will keep closest as I continue to process and accept that I will never see in in presence again.

So my friends and family.....ponder my words and sak...is there something you are putting on the back burner because you think you will always have tomorrow?? Might want to think again.....